Lying in shavasana on my yoga mat, three glasses tipsy with mild indigestion from a large pizza and ice cream, it occurred to me that I might not be getting the most out of the 30 minutes of yoga I had been forcing upon myself for the last 7 days.
I also wondered what I’d have done if this wasn’t the traditional day 8 ‘yummy’ relaxation session. I hadn’t realised that day 8 was traditionally yummy because I had never made it that far. Maybe Adriene knew that after 7 consecutive days of yoga we’d all need a bottle of wine to get us through.
If anything has come out of this third lockdown, it’s the acceptance that I will probably never make it to the end of a 30 day yoga challenge.
This bothers me. I’d love to be the kind of person who gets up every morning and breathes and stretches on their yoga mat, setting their intention for the day. People who do that kind of thing are wholesome, focused, disciplined, healthy… They probably eat green smoothies for breakfast instead of chocolate, and lentil quinoa salads for lunch rather than more chocolate. In fact, I imagine they’ve achieved the kind of inner peace where they don’t even need chocolate.
But for me 30 days of yoga has thus far served as a reminder that, even as we’re all drifting in an endless sea of time, I can’t fit 30 minutes of yoga into my day. Pizza and Fargo just come much more naturally to me, and even the lure of a 10 day streak and or a new PB isn’t enough to get me past day 9.
It’s not the yoga itself that I’m bothered about, more its reflection on me as a person. What does this say about my resolve? What does this say about me? How will I ever stick to anything if I cant even manage 30 measly days of yoga in a row? Surely my inability to persevere with this can only be a indication that I’m destined to fail in all areas of life? Should I have made more of myself by now? Am I losing perspective on this?
Hmm, probably. As much as we’re all desperate to achieve something over lockdown, not getting to the end of a 30 day yoga challenge is unlikely to be one of my deathbed regrets. Maybe our perseverance isn’t solely determined by how far we make it through 30 consecutive days of yoga. Maybe we’re all different, are in the middle of a pandemic and should probably stop comparing ourselves with people who do yoga every day on the internet.
I suppose I learned something from 9 days of yoga after all.
Go easy on yourselves and stay safe!
– Hati
Hati Whiteley 