We all make number twos.
Some of us may deny it, some are even embarrassed by it, but poo is a necessary yet unspoken fact of life.
With bowel movements being quite the taboo, a lot of us don’t know how to have them safely, sustainably and considerately when we’re not in the comfort of our water closets. Whilst we shouldn’t be ashamed of our poos, that shouldn’t mean that other people have to see what we’ve made.
It’s not only about hygiene sanitation (although that’s definitely important). Proper poo practice is something we need to learn and adopt if we want to keep climbing in beautiful places.
We take public access to crags for granted in the UK, but when we defecate and litter on privately-owned land we risk our access to crags being restricted or even completely prohibited. Just take a look at Eagle Tor.
Eagle Tor is a quality bouldering crag in a lovely woodland setting near Cratcliffe, there are tonnes of classics there. That’s according to the BMC anyway – I’ve never actually been there because the landowner banned climbing on their property.
No, the landowner isn’t an intolerant bastard – the family who own the land initially welcomed climbers. Unfortunately they were rewarded with defecation and litter in what is effectively their garden and felt they had no other choice but to prohibit access. It’s hard to blame them really – would you want your children and grandchildren playing in that environment?
It’s not all doom and misery: there are venues where good etiquette has led to lifts on climbing restrictions. Climbers aren’t the only people using the space but we are an easy target when landowners want to point fingers. That’s why we need to make sure we behave like civilised humans even when we’re out of the towns and cities.
So here are a few ways you can responsibly poo outdoors…
Method 1: Don’t poo outdoors.
Go in a toilet – at home, in a service station, buy a cup of coffee in a café and go there, go to a pub, or look on the crowd-sourced Great British Toilet Map and go in a public toilet.
This isn’t always possible, so…
First choose a spot
Get away from the path and at least 200 feet from the nearest water source. No one wants to see what you made, and no one particularly wants to drink it either.
When selecting your location, consider how other people might use enjoy the space before you drop troos (ie. weaselling, a sheltered spot for lunch when hillwalking).
Method 2: dig a cathole.
Dig a hole about 6 – 8 inches deep. Make your stool inside and carry out your loo roll with you. If you don’t have any loo roll, use a flat stone for wiping, then bury that too. Fill in your cathole so that no animals dig up your creation. Mark the spot with an X so no one else tries to use your spot for a while.
Method 3: carry it out (the poo bag).
Poo on some tissue and then pick it up with a poo bag, pack it in a sealable pot/bag and empty it out and flush it all away when you get home. Don’t use the sealable pot/bag for other stuff, disinfect it for ready for next time.
*This is my option for running, rather than carrying a trowel. If you’re easily embarrassed but intend to just carry your poo bag like you would a dog’s, consider carrying a lead too to avoid awkward questions.
If worst comes to worst…
The Last Resort Method
If you’re truly not prepared, the smearing method is disputably a good way to help your poo to break-down quickly. Using a stone, make spread it to make an incredibly thin layer, a veneer of poo if you will. This is particularly effective in sunny countries as the UV rays help to break down your makings. Ensure that you are far far away from water sources or places where people may stumble upon (or into) your poo.
Things you definitely shouldn’t do
- Squish it under a big stone – this slows decomposition. If you want to cover it with stones, make sure they are not touching your poo so that air can circulate.
- Cover it up with toilet roll – you’re not fooling anyone, it looks gross, and you’re littering. This is even worse when done with pink toilet roll.
If you have any other suggestions, I would love to hear them, maybe…
– Hati
Thanks to Beyond the Edge for giving me a good education on crag sustainability during my Rock Climbing Instructor training!
Hati Whiteley 